Two years ago, on the 4th of December, I decided to stop relaxing my hair. I shaved off all of my hair, as the idea of transitioning (gradually cutting off my relaxed hair) felt tedious. I do not regret my decision. Words can’t describe how much I love my curls and coils! The journey has not been easy; I had to teach myself how to take care of my hair in its natural state. I have looked to natural hair websites and “gurus” for support. Unfortunately, I have discovered we are all clueless in regards to our natural curls and coils.
The natural hair movement was created to inspire and empower those who faced discrimination in regards to the texture of their natural hair. Moving in an opposite direction, the movement has become a cult like circus; we are now seeing the implement of bizarre laws/rules people are expected to follow. I refuse to acknowledge such nonsense, as I don’t recall joining a cult. This post is inspired by my frustrations; the following are a few natural hair rules I have broken, with a huge smile on my face and no regrets!
The need to discriminate…
Yes, the need to discriminate is an issue. I find it incredibly sad that many can’t love themselves without bringing down others. The heart of the natural hair movement was once self-acceptance and empowerment. Unfortunately, the movement has been hijacked. Those behind the hijacking seem to feel the need to ignore those who should be at the heart of the movement, those responsible for its existence.
Although I have fine 4A curls, I am aware of the relentless discrimination those with 4C hair face. Many of the buzzwords associated with the natural hair movement are also being hijacked. Brands that never once acknowledged curly/coily hair are jumping on the bandwagon, misinterpreting the movement and failing to acknowledge those with tight curls/coils. Companies dedicated to/specialising in curls will embrace those with wavy hair before acknowledging someone with tight curls.
Every “embrace your curls” campaign features women and girls with loose curls or waves. Waves are not curls! If you were never forced to chemically change the texture of your hair, as it is deemed ugly and unacceptable, please start your own movement. We are not fighting the same battle!
Coconut oil? Who is she?
I don’t like coconut oil in my hair or on my scalp. I can use products that contain coconut oil but the oil alone is poison to my curls and scalp. Coconut oil is royalty in the natural hair community. Anyone who hates it is probably using it wrong or a mere hater. These are annoying regurgitated lies! Coconut oil does not work on everyone’s hair. In fact, no product does. Coconut oil always leaves my scalp and hair feeling incredibly dry as well as flaky. I will forever express my disdain for the oil and if you are offended, I don’t care!
Myths and PR
“What? You like that product? It is so bad for you; you will die if you continue to use it. Use this instead.” Yes, there is nothing I hate more than the need to push myths and lies. A lot of natural hair “gurus” are ambassadors for brands, paid to hard sell crap. Many are going out of their way to lie to you, in order to sell products you do not need.
Growing up, the only product I recall ever using consistently was Dax, a cheap hair grease as well as Dark and Lovely’s leave-in conditioner. My hair grew incredibly fast and was healthy until I got my first relaxer. If these cheap, now deemed “bad” products worked for our hair in the past, why are we buying in to the lies fed by PR machines disguised as “gurus”?! Curl milk? Coil water? Companies are making up stuff you do not need and you are buying the rubbish. Stop it!
I’ve probably broken more rules but I am not one to keep count. So, what rules have you broken?